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Ben knew she was holding out on him, but he had the good grace to let the subject drop.Ten minutes later, he was rubbing his full belly. "Wanna go walk some of this off?"Ally's whole face smiled at the suggestion. "Sure. Where do you want to go?" Nothing big. We could wander around downtown a bit and then head back to campus."So it wasn't glamorous, but Ally didn't want the evening to end just the same. There was something about Ben that intrigued her. Barclay could be funny and sweet, but besides the fact that he was taken, there was always this undercurrent of pressure to take their relationship to the next level. With Ben, being together was totally without pressure. Conversation came easily, but boy did her fantasies get out of control! Heaven help her, but she was beginning to believe that if she ever wanted their relationship to get anywhere beyond platonic ice cream-eating buddies, she was going to have to take matters into her own hands! Man, her parents would keep her from. I couldn't concentrate with school and I felt too wounded to have any social life. I didn't want to begrudge Jack and Janine their happiness, but I felt betrayed by them as well. They must have felt guilty or at least uncomfortable with the way they left things because they each pretty much stuck to their own lives. They rarely visited us and I never went to see them.My father and I were pretty much on our own, when I think back on it, I can tell that he was hurting too because of Jack and Janine's absence, but I was so absorbed in my own misery, I didn't notice it then. My father knew something was wrong. He would often find me in my room crying into my pillow. He tried his best to console me, but it was hard for him considering I wouldn't even tell him why I was upset. I thought about telling him everything, but even though he was the most understanding person I knew, I was afraid of him finding out what his children had been up to. So I just cried and sulked, and every time I did.
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