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You did not come here to help her abuse herself; neither of you did. It is an artifact of life and change, something both of you helped construct with your presumptions without knowing, something which now blocks all direct routes forward. You can never be the man you once were. You have yet to learn how to be the man that you now can be. She has the same lessons to learn about her past and present womanhood.Perhaps in another decade, when both are more comfortable with equal ownership of both shapes, there can be a more middle-of-the-genders mindset from which both can embrace without competing. You have centuries, now; there is time in which to attain this new level of awareness.For now, though, even abstaining would not solve this contention. The knowing would persist, and taint everything.You gently pull her hand towards you, and she slowly swings around as if indecisive, then catches her free arm around your waist and draws you close. There is a deep-drawn kiss, then, probably. Her lithe, girlish form and petite firm breasts were irresistible to me, and she surrendered her maidenhead to me one unforgettable fall evening. She had not been altogether inexperienced. Her boyfriends of the past had enjoyed fondling her above the waist, but she kept them at bay by satisfying them manually and sometimes orally. Surprisingly, none had managed to enter her holy of holies. Fast forwarding ten years, our first daughter had been born and we had settled into a pleasant life of quiet domesticity. One day I asked her if it bothered her that I was the only guy she had ever been totally intimate with. She assured me, rather unconvincingly, that it did not. However, a month later, I was surprised when she raised the subject again and she confessed that it did rather bother her. I told her we could change that, if she really wanted to. We talked about it (usually during foreplay) but I couldn’t tell if she truly wanted to turn fantasy into reality, or if I could handle it. I.
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