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" I said it's all right."If you weren't so almighty virtuous it would be even more all right. I don't know, sometimes I think you don't even care. If you'd only show a little..." Let's not discuss it, Ralph. I'm more tired than I thought." She yawned without much conviction. "Maybe it's just as well to get to bed early for once."To save up energy for the Franklins' party tomorrow night, she thought. Cleonora was right about one thing. I need some distraction.And she vowed to herself that she was going to find it.The following day broke reasonably clear, but quite windy. For most of the day enormous white clouds hung, seemingly motionless, in the sky above the rolling and tossing sea. This apparent calm above was denied down below, where the ocean thrashed with unconcealed urgency.Around the Saunders' home, the trees as well blew first in one direction, then the other, thrown by gusty winds off the sea which seemed to strike with typhoon force as Laura watched from the window.She. Allyou can think about is getting fucked, isn't it?" he said as if it wasobvious."Yeah, but, I mean, I don't know what's happening to me. It's like..." It's okay man, I do know what's happening to you. You're gay. You wereborn to get fucked, and fucked good. I've never seen anyone take cock likeyou." He said softly as he looked me straight in the eye. "You're gonnaneed to get fucked now, but I can't be dickin' you down everyday, you knowwhat I'm sayin'?"It wasn't a conscious thought in my mind, but the implications of his wordswere understood deep down in my soul; I was gay, I needed to get fucked andhe was being non-committal about seeing me. I felt like I was being dumped."Okay, but when do you think I can see you again?" I wanted to die as thosewords involuntarily came out of my mouth -- I felt like such a needy bitch."Soon" was all he said. He smiled and slowly pulled my face to his andkissed me.I had never been kissed by a man before; I had never thought of it orfantasized about.
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