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I really couldnteven blame my transition for my job loss, it was just me doing what I'vedone my whole life, male or female - take anything good I've got going onat the time, and mess it up.It took me about six months of fruitless looking for a replacement job torealize the truth.I had finally run out of chances.Then the second blow hit, when my mom's health broke down. The stress ofhaving to do an awful job, and be the sole support in our household dueto my failings caught up to her, and she had a stroke.She survived, but her working days, and in fact her days of taking careof herself were over, forever.I talked my brother into setting her up in his basement, and for a whiletaking care of her gave me a reason to keep fighting. Well, her, and mydaughter, of course.Until both of those reasons were taken away from me.First, my ex finally realized how feminine I looked now, and we had theblow-up I had been dreading since I first told her I felt more like awoman than a man.It didnt matter. Nothing had been going on, and I had decided to leave several times, but just as I started the pickup, another truck would pull in, and I would think, “This is it.” Each time I had been wrong. I decided that I would get out, smoke a cigarette, and, if nothing happened by the time I finished, I would hit the road.The rest area made a big circle; the ramp back to the interstate almost kissed the ramp off of it. I had parked near the on ramp, so I could see what was coming and going. I had only taken a couple of drags, when another big truck pulled off the interstate. I waited for the whoosh of the air brakes. When it didn’t come, I turned to watch the curve for head lights. Suddenly, the truck appeared with only the running lights. There was plenty of room in front of my pickup and on the opposite side of the road, but the truck chose to park behind me. This did not appear an easy task, as he would have to parallel park into a spot that barely accommodated his long nose Peterbilt and.
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